North Texas Daily

Students better save their money, because the next big thing in cutting edge cell phone tech is hitting the Internet. O2, the U.K.-based communications company and cell phone service provider has unveiled their latest product: phone-shoes.

Each shoe contains a phone on the outside of the sole, meaning anyone willing to use this wacky cell phone  is required to touch their face to the sole of a shoe in order to send and receive calls. Is this the future?

The design looks like the result of a group of inventors getting bored, not to mention possibly intoxicated and thinking of a way to combine a few unrelated items into a brand new cash cow.

Imagining how the creation of this concept came about reminds me of the scene from “Hot Tub Time Machine” when one of the characters plots to fuse Viagra and Twitter, creating the super product “Twitagra.”

While the shoe is “not intended” to be worn for extended periods according to the company, one has to wonder if that could still be an option.

I mean, any time someone gets a rare opportunity to have their shoe-cake and eat it too, they’re probably going to hold on to that opportunity no matter how crazy the result ends up.

As weird as the concepts are, the idea actually has a noble background, or at least a useful one — the shoes are a promotional campaign for O2 Recycle, a program which gives people the opportunity to sell back their broken and used appliances.

Still, even the most rampant electronics consumer still has to wonder why O2 decided to make the trek into the unfamiliar water of shoe design.

After all, if someone is dishing out a bundle of cash for new gadgets, they probably have very little remaining for designer clothes.

This Frankenstein of a product has no target market. People like tiny, slim phones with touchscreens, Internet access, silly apps and bright illuminated screens so shiny that they’re practically blinding when you’re texting during a nighttime stroll. Does the shoe phone even have a chance of competing?

In an article about the phones on Today.com, artist Sean Miles who designed the shoes hints at future products involving purse-phones and glove-phones.

After these creations appear, Miller should really consider putting phones in cheeseburgers, backpacks or cattle prods, just in case he hasn’t already cornered the market on jamming cool stuff inside boring stuff and calling it a revolution in tech design.

These articles of footwear will be unveiled in March at a U.K. exhibition and carry a hefty price tag of $4,000, so early buyers should start saving up before the phone-shoe phenomenon reaches full tilt. Not that I’m holding my breath.

T. S. Johnson is a journalism sophomore. He can be reached at tj_2159@yahoo.com.